Today, driving with the windows down and a warm summer breeze flowing through the car was amazing. Some every day activities seem more meaningful once in a while. Listening to music, I felt the words striking a nerve. The lyrics were real, the music was flowing through my veins. And I felt alive.
Looking out the window, I could feel energies. Let me explain. I'm not going to say I don't believe in God, because that necessarily isn't it. I just believe in all people having energies, and that all things living are connected by these energies, tangling nature and human into an invisible bond that cannot be broken. Maybe it's just the Native American in me, but that is what I feel, and I'm sticking to it. So today, while staring out the window of the car, I felt so many energies it was almost overwhelming.
I was so happy. I am so happy. I could not help but smile as I felt warmth spread through my body and into my soul. For the first time in a long time, I felt connected to the world, and I felt free.
Sometimes, I wish that I could write down what I was thinking as soon as I thought it. Throughout the day, I think "Wow, I would really like to share that with someone," but by the time I have someone to tell, I have completely forgotten what it is I wanted to say. Then, I start writing these blogs and it helps for me to dissect my thoughts and share these thoughts.
Unfortunately, I have not had a chance to start writing my book again. It is going to be so hard to start up again, but I still am worried about finding someone to publish it. There is so much that I want to do to help other people, especially young teens. What I went through in eighth grade was tough, and I want to let other teens know that it is normal to feel those things and to not hesitate to ask for help.
Maybe someone will read this blog and push me in the right direction. I don't know. I hope that once I start writing almost every day that this blog will become more popular, along with my thoughts and my hopes of becoming an author.
Only time will tell. All I know is that life is great, and I am thankful for all of the people in my life.